“My Dad has Alzheimers. He went to the bathroom to comb his hair and brush his teeth. He combed his hair with the toothpaste-filled toothbrush. I can no longer deny it... my dad is losing his mind. So what is there to be grateful for TODAY?!?!
There’s still TIME. Time to reminisce with him and recall favorite memories and share stories. There’s time to tell him how much I love him. There’s time to do special things for him. There’s time to tell him how glad and proud I am to be his daughter.
“I’ve had a wonderful life with my Dad. He’s encouraged me to write, to play the piano, to run, to paint... he’s taught me to be compassionate, even towards people whose faces I cannot see... he’s taught me to value and respect other cultures... to laugh, especially at myself... to love God. When I was the tallest one in my class in the 6th grade, being teased about it, and very self-conscious... Daddy taught me to pull my shoulders back and stand even taller. He gave me the gift of feeling beautiful.
“He showed me how to meet a challenge and see it through. How? He taught me how to drive! :-) I’m an emotional, artistic, dreamer sort of being... my head’s usually in the clouds – mechanical things don’t come easily for me. Like learning to drive. Daddy was patient and persistent. (He did let out a scream one time – when I went up over a hill and ended up in the wrong lane on the other side.) He never yelled at me, not even when I failed my driver’s test because I knocked over the pole while trying to park and got red paint on the side of the car. He kept teaching me how to drive... because he knew without a doubt that I would eventually get it. All these years later I still possess the knowledge that whatever I really want to do, whatever I set my mind to – I can do!”
The next day I wrote:
“Flipped over my Far Side Calendar this morning and there was the same cartoon that was mailed to me anonymously several years ago... In this dramatic turn of events, testimony against Mr. Pumpkineater is about to be given by his sister, Jeannie Jeanine Eatzucchini. Found out many months later that it was Daddy who sent it to me. :-)
“I’m still recalling lots of memories. I’m so grateful Mom and Dad gave me the opportunity to take piano lessons and insisted I continue when I was ready to quit. They always listened when I practiced, “requested” favorite songs and provided an abundance of encouragement. Playing the piano has always been a ready emotional outlet for me and is now one of my greatest joys.
“I also recall having a school assignment to write a poem or short story and being absolutely confounded about it. I couldn’t get started and was frustrated and crying. Dad kept encouraging me and telling me I could do it and then would leave the room. Finally I did do it – because he would not let me give up.
“Dad and I ran the Distance Race in Wheeling, WV, one year – 12.4 miles. He finished ahead of me, even though I clearly remember passing him during the race! He eventually confessed he got a “ride to a restroom.” The cheater.
“I remember when Mom was in the hospital once and Daddy fixed eggs for us for breakfast. They were runny, not fully cooked and nicely scrambled like Mom made them. They really grossed me out, but I choked them down, so I wouldn’t hurt his feelings.
“One of Daddy’s favorite memories of me was when I was little I would stand on the toilet in the bathroom to be able to see to comb my hair in the mirror above the sink. One time I was wearing a pair of new red shoes and forgot to put the lid down before I stepped up... ‘er in. Mom and Dad laughed their heads off. Even if it was at my expense, glad I made him laugh! :-)”
So, there was that day I knew things would never be the same with my dad again, but because I was in the habit of looking back on my day with gratitude, I realized on that very same day... that I was the daughter of an extraordinary man... and was amazingly blessed!
Even on the day he died in August of 2008... though I was grief-stricken beyond anything I had ever imagined, I was still grateful Charles William King was my dad.
Thank you God for these very special gifts... awareness of the reasons to be consciously grateful... and to be the daughter of “Bud” King.
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